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Post by Daisy on Jan 16, 2005 20:28:15 GMT -5
Boy, it sure is a good thing you didn't have the clap at the same time.
On a more serious note: I can't believe burning embers were on your eyeball. That just sounds like so much pain! Glad to hear that you're doing ok now.
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Post by diecheerleader on Jan 29, 2005 2:19:32 GMT -5
i think i have run out of stories.
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Post by Grandma on Jan 31, 2005 14:16:10 GMT -5
i think i have run out of stories. you disappoint me
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Post by barriers on Jan 31, 2005 16:18:18 GMT -5
i think i have run out of stories. what about that time you moved on up, to the east side?
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Post by MR GUMBY on Feb 1, 2005 2:22:42 GMT -5
what about that time you moved on up, to the east side? no.... i hate the ending of that story, besides i always end up looking bad to people who don't know the full story – that fucking badger was just asking for it, with that skirt and those boots... i mean.... c'mon!!!
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Post by diecheerleader on Feb 10, 2005 2:17:41 GMT -5
ok...another quick story....
once, Strange and I got done robbing some nuns. disappointed with the amount of money that nuns carry, we decided to go out and get drunk. we then took a walk by the ocean....maybe it was the 2 bottles of vodka i had drank earlier or maybe it was the moonlight reflecting in Strange's eyes, but....i decided to propose to her. it was very romantic....i was down on one knee and everything. her response was pretty much what i expected........she kicked me in the face and then proceded to knock me down so i was on my back, bleeding and freaking out. she then kicked me repeatedly in the ribs until i passed out from the pain.
when i awoke i was alone on the beach with a note from Strange stuffed in my mouth. it read..."I'll think about it....but i'll need a HUGE ring, bitch!!"
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Post by Shoesh on Feb 10, 2005 2:53:05 GMT -5
.. and then Shone had to run to get in time for class. ~Fin~
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Post by diecheerleader on Mar 7, 2005 2:45:53 GMT -5
so i was drying beans for use in my newly acquired bean-bong. i wasn't sure how it would work, but i was excited to try. so i smoke a few bowls worth of beans and wait to see what happens. all of a sudden....BAM....i see God. he says unto me..."Hey, what's up?" i sayeth unto him..."Um...you know...just doin' my thang." he repliedeth..."Sweet, i know what that's all about, bitch." then he challenges me to some arm wrestling and i accept. he beats me 100 times in a row because...well...you know....he's God and all. he was a good sport though....he wasn't all up in my grill saying "Yeah...beat that, bitch....you ain't got shit!!!" he was just cool....and then made me some grits. next thing i know i was alone and naked somewhere on the frozen tundra with a balloon on my head and a dead rabbit in my shoe. good times, yo.....good times.....
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Post by Shoesh on Mar 15, 2005 17:52:38 GMT -5
The dude from my arvatar is an actor from the Dutch version of Sesamestreet. I ran into him at the supermarket, and all I could do was stop and stare. The grumpy bastard, he's awesome! Did anyone else here ever get to meet someone you look(ed) up to?
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Post by MR GUMBY on Mar 15, 2005 20:58:39 GMT -5
one crazy night i met larry emder AND 'baby' john burgess together at a club (they do/did the australian versions of price is right / wheel of fortune).
highlight of my life.
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Post by diecheerleader on May 31, 2006 1:38:20 GMT -5
once, when i was 10...i beat the shite out of a kid in the back of the school bus. he pissed me off somehow...and i punched him, threw him to the floor and kept punching. it was the only time i've ever fought in my life. that's what he gets for saying blueberry strudel bites suck.
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Post by diecheerleader on May 31, 2006 1:41:12 GMT -5
once, when i was 3, i beat the shite out of a teddy bear.......he was looking at me funny.
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Post by Lava on May 31, 2006 1:42:41 GMT -5
bastard, that was MY fucking teddy bear
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Post by diecheerleader on May 31, 2006 1:43:30 GMT -5
well, it shouldn't have been looking at me....he got what he deserved
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Post by diecheerleader on May 31, 2006 1:48:34 GMT -5
once, when i was 17, i saw a chicken bong made in a high school art class...it was amazing. it was later destroyed by the principal.
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Post by dimples on May 31, 2006 1:50:32 GMT -5
I got stabbed by some dude with a pencil in art class... Right in the shoulder...
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Post by diecheerleader on May 31, 2006 1:51:00 GMT -5
that wasn't me, was it?
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Post by dimples on May 31, 2006 1:51:16 GMT -5
If only someone would have given him a case... *sigh*
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harro
New Recruit
Posts: 0
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Post by harro on May 31, 2006 1:55:01 GMT -5
I just got a call from a time share co-operation wanting me to take part in their marketing extravaganza but they thought I was a Mr Landsdowne.
"Sorry, but he's dead I shot him in the head". So what's your quandry? My "quandry" was Mr Landesdowne for giving out my number and that's why I put a bullet in his head. So how are you related to Mr Landesdowne? "He was my bitch" Well how about I get my supervisor to take you through the offer? "Just as long as finds his own bitch I have no problems, Goodbye"
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Post by diecheerleader on May 31, 2006 1:56:22 GMT -5
HAHAHAHAHA!!!!! SWEET ASS!!
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Post by siner on Jun 1, 2006 6:14:58 GMT -5
I got stabbed by some dude with a pencil in art class... Right in the shoulder... i got a guy with a compass
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Post by Dope on Jun 1, 2006 19:29:09 GMT -5
Did you make a circle on him? Or made one of those like... flower thingies.
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Post by Dope on Jun 6, 2006 18:59:08 GMT -5
So a female friend of mine is freaking out to me because she was gettin' funky with her man while unprotected.. apparently he pulled out but a stray drop or so still got inside.
I sit quietly for a moment, and then reply "So.... where did the rest of the load land?"
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Post by Lungsey on Jun 6, 2006 19:14:05 GMT -5
and this is when you were introduced to ceiling cat....
;D
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Post by siner on Jun 7, 2006 4:46:09 GMT -5
Did you make a circle on him? Or made one of those like... flower thingies. no but i got him in the forehead so he had/has a dot right between the eyes
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